Sunday, July 28, 2013

Introvert Diaries

Why is it that whenever I have a ton of good ideas and can't stop typing it's two in the morning?? This does not bode well if I have a career as a writer...

Speaking of writing I must talk about a series of books very dear to my cold antisocial heart. The Princess Diaries by Meg Cabot. I will begin by saying that the books are COMPLETELY different from the movies. They are seriously two different stories.

Secondly, I realize that it is not a "serious" piece of literature or a "classic" and it is not analyzed and revered by intellectuals. However, I am not ashamed to say they are some of my favorite books and a huge inspiration to me as a writer.
 Because the way Meg Cabot writes is very witty, sarcastic, and conversational with popular culture references and slang. Before I read her books I didn't know you COULD write like that and get your work published. I didn't know you could tell a great story that way and that to emotionally involve your audience you don't need to make them cry or ponder the can also make them laugh.

Also, guess what? While sitting in the break room at work I was half listening to a man on the T.V. talk about potatoes and he said that

"Leaving a potato in the sun turns it green and the green part is poisonous"

I actually looked up from Pinteresting on my phone to stare at the T.V. in confusion.

Um I beg your pardon good sir, but I distinctly remember an episode of Arthur where D.W. is upset and believes she will soon die because she ate a green potato chip which Arthur informed her were lethal but the potato chip ended up being harmless.... so what in the verse are you talking about???

I've consulted google and it turns out that "green potatoes do contain a toxin called Solanine which can cause nausea headaches and neurological issues" but it also said "a 100 lb. person would need to ingest 16 oz of green potato to feel ill" (O'Connor 2007)

 So the moral of that story is that I should really stop using Arthur as a life reference...

I had to blow up, in total, over two dozen balloons today. When the fourth person in a row asked for balloons and could I please hurry? because they need them in 5 minutes. My response was something like this:

 I am completely inept at balloons but I was the only person who was willing to do it. I was never trained to do balloons by the way. I just had to figure it out as I went along, which explains part of my ineptitude but you'd think after a year I would have caught on better....

The label maker in the floral department is a constant source of anxiety because it is very old and temperamental and you need to use all kinds of special tricks and take it apart twice and press the resent button four times before it prints anything.

I would say we need a new one except this stores vacuum is so old you could still catch the black plague from it and one of the cash register displays is being held in place by a can of cream of celery soup. So I don't exactly have high hopes for a new printer.

Side note: here's a link to the article I read about green potatoes if you are deeply fascinated and yearn to know more:

Todays gifs: